Snapshots of June: Pride and Neon Signs

Dear Friends and Fellow Travelers,

Suddenly it’s the end of June! I have a handful of reflections from the past month, which won’t get tied up with a bow at the end. These are just snapshots, scattered with a few neon signs. Such is life.

garden zinnia

One
I was knocked out by some side effects this past week. While I lay around feeling miserable, I was reminded how quickly things can change. There are some items on my list of things I want to do while I’m still feeling healthy. They haven’t seemed too urgent since I have so many good days. Being suddenly and completely non-functional for a few days was the neon sign I needed to start on some of that list now that I feel better and stop waiting for the right moment. The right moment is now.

Two
I got a letter from my oncologist’s office saying that she is leaving. She has been such a great doctor for me, and this is a huge loss, maybe akin to losing a beloved therapist. I’ll see her one last time this week and hope and beg to be referred to someone good. You can bet I’ve been down the research rabbit hole of possible providers!

Three
We went to a Celebration of Life this month for a friend who is in hospice care. This was the first time I’d been to such a gathering where the one being celebrated was present. It was beautiful and poignant and such a reminder to say all the things. How you’ve touched my life. How you’ve made me laugh. How you’ve made me feel. Neon sign. This friend is clearly so deeply and widely beloved. It was an honor to celebrate his life so fully lived.

Four
As Tanya Tucker sings, bring the flowers now, while we’re living.

Five
I spent a lot of time working my way through a series of online classes to practice painting flowers this month. Practice. I learned that I much prefer a bigger paper or canvas on which to paint. Small feels tight and restrictive. It also underscored the importance of the underlayer, the “chaos layer,” that ends up guiding the painting even while most of it is not visible in the end. Chaos can become beauty. What lies beneath is important in painting, as in life.

Six
As we finish the celebration of Pride month, the rights of the LGBTQIA community in this country are absolutely under attack, and our trans family are especially cruelly targeted. And still I feel how the tide has shifted, and the hateful are losing. (I believe this is one reason for the extreme backlash, in addition to diverting attention from real issues.) Two things can be true at the same time. One of the lessons of Pride is that we celebrate even amid adversity.

Seven
We marched in our local Pride parade this month which was fun and joyous and thankfully not too hot. We got to march behind the local corgi club and who doesn’t love a corgi decked out for Pride. What struck me most were all the kids and young people both in the parade and lining the route.  They were there with queer families, straight families, in groups. They were awash in rainbows and sequins and t-shirts proudly stating identities, taking up space, celebrating our muchness. Neon sign.

Eight
I was both shocked and thrilled to see young people from the high school that my kids graduated from marching with a banner they made claiming Pride for themselves at this school. My kids graduated from high school 12 and 9 years ago, and this simply NEVER would have happened at that school even that recently. I hear there are even out queer teachers there now. Sea changes, driven by these young people.

Nine
This month I watched the new documentary It’s Only Life Afterall on the Indigo Girls, Amy Ray and Emily Saliers. I’ve followed them closely for most of their careers and have seen them in concert numerous times. It is a fantastic documentary of these women who were so far ahead of their time in so many ways. They blazed the trail for queer artists and paid a big price for being out. They have walked their talk with their continuous activism, which they learned to let local impacted communities lead a lot earlier than many of us. It is streaming now, and I highly recommend it.

Ten
I am amazed and overjoyed by the numerous young queer musical artists in all genres these days. They sing about loving who they love, about heartbreak, about grappling with faith in the face of hateful religious institutions, about mental health, about family, about having fun, about pushing boundaries. There is something tremendously healing for my inner youth about hearing this music become almost unremarkable. And witness the mainstream explosion of Chappell Roan! We’ve come a long way baby. We have a long way to go. Two things can be true at the same time. The list of younger queer artists is deep and long. A few that are on repeat for me these days are Joy Oladokun, Katie Pruitt, Fancy Hagood, and Corook.

Eleven
I guess June has reminded me of the precarity of life in a motivating rather than overwhelming way, of the long game, and of the need to celebrate who we are and those we love, those who touch our lives, those who’ve paved the way, and those who will carry us into the future. Sometimes I just need a neon sign.

As always, thanks for being here. I appreciate you.

Love on your people. Here’s some love from me.

Maija

Songs of the Week: Through by Fancy Hagood. Great for when you need a little pep in your step to keep going.

This is for the lost and the broken-hearted,
let yourself feel, get the healing started
Learn to let go, let the spirit move
No way out only way is through

And Bring My Flowers Now by Tanya Tucker

The complete Healing Happens playlist is available on Spotify and Apple Music.

Healing Happens on Spotify

Healing Happens on Apple Music